Sunday, April 04, 2010

I have found the lesson

Thank you to all who have so kindly, gently, and lovingly helped me. The comments on my last post and the ones on babycenter have been wonderful to read, wonderful to ponder, a balm on my heart.

As I watched conference yesterday I was filled, and only after reflecting on all of this combined have I concluded what I needed to learn. I should say re-learn, in a better an deeper way. It is something I have been taught for years, but now understand better.

The only opinion about me that matters is the Lord's opinion.

I have been blessed, truly, deeply, abundantly blessed with people in my life that love me. I rather adore myself too, which is sometimes not such a good thing... but you are all right. I have set far to much stock, for far to long, on what others think of me.

Perhaps this harks back to my childhood, when others proclaimed me ugly. Those who loved me said otherwise, but for some reason I believed the negative others. Or perhaps it was an extension of my knowledge that people are likely to be rather blind to their own faults.
Where ever it came from, I was wrong to allow others to challenge the whisperings of the spirit.

God loves the stuffing out of me, and I'm so thankful that He does. He is acquainted fully with all of my shortcomings, my secret thoughts, my desires, and my potential. He knows me better than I do, and He tells me I'm a good person. So I'm going to trust that, and try again to see the good person he sees in others. I AM going to continue to look for the good in them, I am going to assume good intentions in them. I am going to continue to see God in every face I look on.

Thank you all for helping me find my way through the fire. This side of the trial feels lovely.


AutismPsyD said...

As I sat through the sessions today, you were on my mind. I am sure you know which of those talks are applicable right now. I am just grateful for how the Lord operates and the answers He sends through His servants.

Hugs from the northland of NYS, R included.

Aaron and crystal said...

I love you, and know without a doubt that you are now and have always been my BEAUTIFUL BFF!

Anna said...

I call it looking at life through my 'Child of God Glasses'. I think that is the true definition of humility actually. Not to see all the worst in yourself, but to see your full self as God sees you. And as our Father, he loves us. And he can and WILL help strengthen us when we are weak, and pick us up when we stumble. Which we do. Often.